Archive for the ‘THOUGHTS’ Category

sad.jpg

Sadness begins in our experiences and starts creeping from our feet to our head. We wander like a lost child in the desert, as we grieve and long for a feeling that we seek, particularly when we get rejected or ignored. On the other hand, when we are happy, we just live through the thing that we love to do. Furthermore, these feelings affect how we write our poems, and how interpretations convey the picture of a specific piece.

Have you ever wondered why can you write fast and meaningful when you’re sad? That’s because you assume yourself as entirety of the poem. Imagine your experiences ; the pain, the heartbreaks and vile reminders of an obnoxious encounter. Sadness is a grave feeling that we used to hide but difficult to hold on. Moreover, it takes time to recover; to run away from the forest surrounded by the lonely vibes of the past. When you are unhappy, you lift yourself effortlessly in the air, only to permit overflowing ideas to crash through the humongous stones at the corners of our way of thinking. The state of despair also tells us that there is something that we should get rid out of our comfort zone, because we feel quite downcast behind the shadows that we cast. Visualize yourself walking the wintry mountain, cold and alone. You look for someone who can catch a fire for you but in reality you can’t even see them. Compared to poetry, the only person who can ignite spirits to commence elimination of unwanted emotions is you. You are the one who can set the fire to rain afterwards. In short, sorrow draws a response to us to make a way out, or shortcut to happiness.
Ever wonder why it is just hard to write when happy? Because when we are in summer-bound bliss, we enjoy the moment. When we are glad and floating in cloud nine, we are high like we never notice what is going on at the time except for eternal euphoria that seem to take the shape of our temporary emotions.So much for that, time ticks slower than usual when overjoy kills its tempo. Meanwhile, it glues yourself to that moment until you get tired and get over the fleeting ecstatic tickle. Then later you will just realize that it’s time to write poems again and you find it easier than before.

What Hides Behind Her Smile?

Posted: February 19, 2017 in THOUGHTS

I only caught her silhouette sitting just few inches from me. She was average in height, and there were cold bags that occupied the space beneath her eyes.

I was motionless and muted with all the voices around me. There was an empty, narrow aisle which was a home to slippers and shoes. To my left was a window, and fresh air was all that I got. I could smell different kinds of perfume but I didn’t know where they came from. Looking back to the vehicle’s rear, chasing cars and bikes were the common things to see. Nothing else to discover – nothing new.

The whole day was tiring, and math lessons kept my head spinning until my peripheral vision captured an unusual face. It was not a beautiful face that we always see in the t.v. but it was also not that revolting. To think she was not a dream girl that ( I think) can captivate our hearts instantly, she had this kind of eyes that have a curious sparkle to strangers.They hit me between my eyes and I’m kind of stoned to my position.

Turned out she’s as young as her heart. And I thought she could be more approachable when I looked to her round eyes.

For a moment of silence, the winds have changed and they turned cold. It seemed that post-December breeze had hit my face.

Just when the twilight crunched the blackness and whiteness, and the road was quite nigh to our house, she went down the vehicle with this “strikingly lovely” gaze that ensnared me for a couple of seconds.

She wasn’t perfect like the girls that I normally see every day but she had this thing that separates her from other girls that I’ve seen. If I say that a stare is cute or charming, it would be overrated.

Despite of that, I won’t bother mentioning that her right cheek dimple is too deep that it seems to light her whole day in the dark.

Thinking that something had made her more alluring, that was her smile that stopped my world for two seconds. Nothing else- somewhat new.

 

Short Reflection of Randomness

Posted: October 17, 2016 in THOUGHTS

There was this time when I want to glimpse over the clouds above. It was really a feeling I can’t contain. It was blue all over. I can’t help but to contemplate.

As I head to home a while ago, a quick rush of childish images have blurred the sights. It was invisible to all people except me. Flashy, emphatic – it has appeared for a short time. Two children straying on a street. They beg for food and people just pass by.

Another sight I saw was nature. She was crying. I looked lowly on the window to the river. Crying again. She was sad. She has this dress but not a chic and fashionable outfit. Decorations burst on her face. Black. All black. Dirt.Nothing but dirt.

Pollution. That’s the design.

Thirty minutes of space-warping imagining was full of unexpectedness. Will the driver ask me for an additional fare if he ever caught me swimming in a different world? The same world that I dwelt temporarily for thirty short minutes. No one will understand my weirdness except me. Oh wait. I’m wrong. You have read this so I bet you understand this right?

I wrote this for 15 minutes as time faded in my screen. Seven minutes have passed now. I was still typing. Non-stop until there’s no word left to spit. My brain would explode until it becomes a star. My imagination will become hues of summer.Tinted like autumn leaves that bounces rarely. Not even close I can get thrilled in my writing. It was randomness. Some sort of interstellar connection with the universe. Won’t you believe that whenever you contemplate, the whole universe listens until your pleads become stardust. Four minutes remaining in my time until I become a full-grown speck of galactical matter.

The next moment was for three minutes to leave the shop and to continue being child again for few hours, hoping that the next morning I will be a part of the so- called happy group of dust called sun.

 

Be Grateful Everyday

Posted: March 18, 2015 in MY EXPERIENCE, SCHOOL, THOUGHTS
Tags: , , ,

Several hours ago, my heart is nowhere to found ; as it is throbbing so uncontrollably quick. The moment when I woke up at 7 am, I began to anticipate that the worst is yet to come. Soon, I picked up my cellphone to check the time lapsed since I rose from my cold bed. The floor seems to be pushing my feet to the space between the air and the ground. Chilling inside, I drank four glasses of water to lessen the nervousness pulling my body side to side. There where I stood steadily, I peeked at the window and watched how the sun shone on everything under it : how elegant its rays penetrate the neon-colored hearts; how its solarbeams reach the river-crossed and gold-struck eyes.

As I walked towards school, I’m still certain (and hopeful) that we could pass our programming defense. The fact that we stayed 9 pm last night was no joke at all. And as one of my classmates saw the other’s eyes teeming with rivulets of dirty white drops, I felt a strong empathy to one another. And as one of the members who didn’t help that much, I still hoped for the best that our main programmer would still be able to cope up the near-to-losing-hope scenario. Our eyes that night folded like leaflets lacking air, as for us we’re on the verge of throwing our hopes away. Like what others say- we can do it!

So the morning rush was sweet but bitter breeze kept coming passing through the corridors. Heading to the topmost floor, I witnessed them -Eyes have no sleep, minds wander inside the program, trying to squeeze every juice left between the brains and the codes. It’s so hard to see your teammates doing everything just to pass while you’re just standing on the distance, watching their suffering. I can’t take that to happen due to the fact that all of us are experiencing the same mental anguish.

The moment has come but thanks to my mates because instead of backing out without prior knowledge ( or just little knowledge) regarding the program, they strengthened their desire and confidence to an unimaginable level. Who would have done that while under extreme pressure? So much to say, the defense went smooth and quite jagged at the same time which we find still successful ( or at least a bigger % of surpassing). We barely aced it!

At the end of the day, my simple thank you won’t be still enough to repay the efforts of  our main programmer. From her sacrifices of late night staying up to teaching us how the code works, I still hope for the day that I could pay her efforts not in terms of money but in terms of good will and good deeds. I’m so grateful to meet people like her who never just think of herself but thinks of the greater good of our welfare. How beautiful God’s hands are! He cared so much that he made the finest people who will lead other’s lives; teach them how to color a rainbow and show them how to make the earth spin in a series of galactic elegance.

Still, I have so many things to thank for and I couldn’t count them all. From my life to friends and possessions, I think I’m still one of those luckiest and blessed kid ever lived. Trudging the streets with bright city lights as I look upon those children in the corner- some have no food to eat, no clothes to wear and no life to spare. Still, I’m thankful to God for his greatness he showed to me- How unfair life is, we still managed to survive somehow. This is the way of gratefulness as is – a blessing to seal in the jar of today’s adventure; so mysterious and prepossessing.

How good God is. Being endlessly thankful to Him is enough to pay half of his sacrifices he’d done for us. The other half goes on how we handle our lives and now up there, he’s already happy with that. JUST LOOKING AT OUR SMILES, HE’S ALREADY FULFILLED IN GIVING US PERPETUAL LOVE AND GRACE.

bbb_2

My messy handwriting

Who the hell cares in handwriting? As for others, it doesn’t mean something. Some say that handwriting does matter so much because it reflects your attitude.

Well, my handwriting appears to be really disorganized. To be honest, my handwriting varies depending on my mood. When I’m feeling good that day, expect my penmanship to be really smooth, very glossy and distinct. On the other hand, when I go home with a bad day, my handwriting would tend to be jagged, tiring and unaligned.

It’s truly a major impression when a handwriting is pleasant in everyone’s sight. Psychologists say that a person’s handwriting defines his/her attitude, which nearly hit my point. I just wish that it won’t also signify a person’s physique because sometimes, my handwriting is so unstable that it becomes really fat (lol I don’t want to be fat though haha).

So my handwriting is untidy. Does it suggest I’m also untidy when it comes to taking care of things? I must say yes. I have to admit it that my room is so dirty too. Lots of paper scattered in the closet, floor and dark places like corners.

My mind can be chaotic at times, especially those times when mixed emotions stir the tempo of my mood. I couldn’t sleep well. I couldn’t study well. I couldn’t even get a book from the mini shelf. I guess when a wicked hurricane tackles me so badly that day, my works are all being involved. From socializing to writing, my appetite would reach a serious decrementation. Honestly speaking mates. It will ruin my whole day.

Looking at the natural side of it, do writers care much in their penmanship? Based on my acquired knowledge, writers do not necessarily care in their handwriting. As much as they have written their pieces, they are already satisfied in that. And you know what? Writers have the messiest handwriting because due to the fact that they think fast, they write what they brainstorm so fast that they don’t mind anymore how decent their writings could end. But that doesn’t mean that all writers possess the same ability because I’ve also known some writers who have those sexy handwriting ( and with curves nuff said haha).

It’s up to you whether you disagree or not about the concept behind our handwriting. No matter who you are, I’m 100% sure that your handwriting sits beside a crown while smiling behind the clouds underneath the star-dusted galaxy. Every handwriting is genuine. It just takes someone to see it the right way; the suitable improvisation to place words nicely after our hands seize enough air to let our feelings fly freely, then later crash in the paper. Handwriting is more of self-discovery, as those lines we draw are what represent us in the future :the thing that we called life.

You know that moment when you did your best but just ended up as failure? You know that moment when you expect things to be better but turned out worse?

You know those moments, right? What could possibly go wrong on them?

Most of us expect things to be great. Most of us rely on the brighter side of everything. Most of us eye for the light than darkness? But why there are incidents in our life that we just want to give up?  By mere fate? By strange chance? Or they are just bound to happen?

This is it. Friday. Just an ordinary day until my patience runs out. You know the game Dota 2? Well there’s what we called recycling of items which involves sacrificing ten items for  crucible charm jewel which contains lots of bundles (sets for heroes). If you predicted right ( that your team will win), you will gain one win. Win three battles and there you go, happy bundle! But if you predicted wrong and lose two battles, OMG, say bye to bundles and say hi to fragments. I have two charms, assuming that I will win them two. But damn, I felt so unlucky that day because I lose them both. I was really reckless in risking the charms until I figured out that i should first think of pros and cons before placing it on a danger zone. Bad luck and bad day= worst feeling. Sad life indeed.

The bad luck continued to roll on. Saturday. It’s our play today but sadly we didn’t win. I knew we did our bestest of the best but it turned out that the plaque wasn’t for us. I knew I might sound bitter here but this wasn’t the unlucky day for me. Holy wood of rainforest, the charm fragment curse resumed to amaze me. Amaze me to be annoyed again. You know that moment when you’re already at the end, so close yet so far still from the reach? You know that single push which is hard to do, simply because something seems to be dictating you inside your head? Well, bad luck mate. Bad luck. And the worst this day was when my aunt didn’t allow me to go to our overnight agreement. Sigh. I’d explained everything to her, but it seems that there’s a ringing force around me, hindering me from going. This was for project but for pete’s sake, I was just allowed to stay at house instead of doing our project. I didn’t have the force to reckon that I was right all along. Maybe they just cared for me. I understood that. They just cared for me.

How it feels to be unlucky the whole day?

-Your patience goes out of meter.

-Your blood boils like 100 degrees

-Skins go rough and cold( like reptiles)

-Notice the lines on the forehead. Yes, they stiffen.

-Eyes? Hmm. They are full of fury.

-Your hands want to punch someone but you can’t really do.

-You blame everything.

-You curse those who/what lead to your bad luck.

-You wish that this day is just a dream

-You wish to give up ( or try again next time then fail again)

For me, being unlucky is another term for chance dependents, considering that a bad luck is just a slight error to take note. Bad luck may affect the mood. It can ruin the whole good day. Even the whole week but not for months or years ( ’cause it may sound to be unrealistic). Unlucky persons tend to depend on good luck, thinking of things to be achieved shortly with little effort. Woah, does it sound like me? Haha. I guess so.

Today I realized something. The more we depend on luck, the more we get stressful when we don’t get the things we wanted. The more we think of luck, the more we forget the more realistic side of living. Let’s be thankful that we’re still here, living a normal and happy life even after a bad day. Let us also think of others who are not into living a normal life. They don’t deserve that miserable life, but we choose our life to be miserable. All of us undergo problems and sacrifices, it’s just the time that never ceases to unravel the angles of our different perspective when it comes to luck. Time is a tool that knows if luck is in our side or not. Fate could be reliable too, but fate could carry us into believing that all things come at the right time on the right track.

Who knows where time and fate might send you? Only God knows what’s best for us. No matter how unlucky or lucky our day is, he always seeks the best solutions in life. Indeed, everything happens for a reason. It just depends on us if we want to give up or carry on living.

Beginning this day, practice saying God bless instead of Good luck because you are blessed and not just lucky! 😉

Zlif

Posted: February 7, 2015 in THOUGHTS
Tags: , ,

I don’t know what to write for this day. Things are random and I’m a bit shaky. I can’t describe the things that happened today. All I want is sleep,sleep,sleep and more sleep. ❤ ❤

I’m craving for it honestly. I just want to relax after a long tiring day. My energy’s drained. My body’s worn-out.My mind’s weakened. My bed’s ready for another  action. Just a passive action.

I’m going to sleep now. Sweet dreams ahead of us!

Most people will contradict me. “Atheist, atheist”. This word will likely be heard when they know that someone doesn’t believe in religion.

Folks, this is just for me. I don’t have any intentions to mix your mind with things that aren’t favorable to your beliefs.

I, as Roman Catholic Christian, do not have strong commitment to stuff linked to religion.I find religion as just a mere basis for people to stick in what others believe (like just going with the flow of the waterfalls). But I truly respect religion at all costs because for some, religion changes their life, their total self, their interests, their limitations,everything. Religion is a holy talisman worn by people at all times. For instance,those adults I sometimes see in church while being down on their knees are those people who are committed to it. Even from a distance, I can really discern the flaming dedication of them for religion. Not just with prayers spent for hours, but I admire those profound strands of phrases that are directly to God. As peaceful as ocean hue, their voices split in splendorous tones. So pleasant and pleasing to hear, like my heart could take them all day, all year long.

Still, I don’t believe in religion because it sometimes does war.

It tears me up for real that the religion destined to bring us together is somehow the other way around. In my country, the Islam religion from the southernmost island is widespread. There lies a vast community of Muslims who are believers of Islam and consider Allah as their God. Sadly, in order to obtain peace through religion, they instead go for a more peaceful way for THEM: war(Holy war or Jihad for the Muslims.). Honestly, who would want for a war to take place? Who would like to see a bloodshed, so brutal and inhumane just to seek for harmony? Can you attempt to watch a television that is drowning in red? Can you attempt to witness a crowd in tears? Can you make it to stare to dead bodies that are wasted just for the peace that other people long to achieve?Did God teach them how to kill? Did God preach them how to take others’ lives?

People will judge them as wicked and evil. Some may judge them as people who do not deserve living. Judgment differs. Judgment moves in various speeds from various people. But who are we to judge them? They are still people:people who are victims of religion.

Like what I’ve said before, religion can change a life. It can transform someone’s life as good as others or it could be the best for them. It could also be a clean slate for other people who seek light through enlightenment.Inevitably speaking, it could also lead them to a worst state where their spirits are being fed to pride and greed, brought by extreme loyalty to what molds them spiritually.

I can’t take to see these events, even for a glimpse. There are other ways to achieve peace through religion without undergoing to a clash of believers.

Judge me by my words and phrases I weaved tonight as I wrote this thought for I’m just a person. I’m a person who is imperfect and vulnerable to temptations. For I’m a person who always find himself in a sea of people, as others enjoy the drift in the wind. For I’m just a person who changes other’s lives. For I’m just a person who loves everyone who earnestly listen to HIM. I’m just a person who is cold. My only warmth is HIM.

Judge me because I don’t like religion. Despise me or throw me to a bed of thorns.

In every time sun rises, moon glistens, seas nimble, mountains roar, wilderness wails, there is just one thing for sure behind these aesthetic creations.

After all HIS love that HE gave to us, HE is the sole epitome I’m always looking for.

I just believe in God after all. My faith I entrust to HIM grows everyday in the shining whispers from my true blue heart.

Ngiti (Smile)

Posted: January 30, 2015 in THOUGHTS
Tags: , ,

smilee

 

Smile best describes my mood today. People on streets are smiling. Children are smiling. Even my pocket is smiling( if you know what I mean lol). The mosses in the distant rocks are also smiling. The trees also smile as they dance to the beat of the wind. Even the sun hung from above is smiling over the people below it. At night, when I’m about to sleep, moon also smiles upon me, leaving glitters of moonbeams on my face. There is no constellation tonight but instead a constellation of stars forming a wide grin. Smile is everywhere. Smile is widespread. Smile is contagious.Smile is free so smile.

Smile because you’re beautiful in your own way. 🙂 🙂 🙂

Be a Rainbow

Posted: January 29, 2015 in THOUGHTS
Tags: , , ,

sugarrrrrx

May mga oras sa buhay natin na kailangan ng kapwa natin ng tulong. Sa bawat pagpatak ng luha sa mga problemang nararanasan, kailangan niya ng balikat na sasandalan. Sana ay maging ilaw tayo sa mga taong dumadaan sa madilim na landas ng buhay. Sa pamamagitan nito, mas liliwanag ang kanilang pag-asang mabuhay nang hindi nag-iisa ngunit kasama ang tunay at tapat na kaibigan katulad mo na nakakabasa nito. 🙂