Archive for March, 2015

Opaque

Posted: March 31, 2015 in HAIKU, POETRY
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Impassable heart

Refuses to seep lilac beams

Lifeless, blood in vain.

Ostriches

Posted: March 30, 2015 in MY EXPERIENCE, POETRY
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os

(Originally written March 30,2014)

Back then were aliens and monsters
This time were mysteries I used to ponder
That always make me think
“How could they do that in a quick blink?”

I remembered one hazy March weather
When my bloodshot eyes unveiled a peculiar luster
All I’ve heard were trembling moans
That sound like sweet yet odd tones

Frozen in my bushy disguise
Like being stuck in an imaginary ice
I’ve witnessed the collision of incoming jet planes
The animals went wild in the wrong lanes

Unusual sightings continued to haunt me
As their temperatures rose unexpectedly
I couldn’t withstand the heat they’re giving
So I fell down in a ghostly building

Acids spat out on each other’s beak
Slender tongues simultaneously licked
As my tummy growled in disgust
Recovering from that gruesome blast

Tongue-twister speaking
While swiftly escaping
The dense, dark woods of ostriches
That gave me hundreds of stitches

My eyes close by themselves

Posted: March 29, 2015 in POETRY
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In just a blink

you sink

.

In just a flip

you sleep

.

In just a finger snap

you swap

.

Just in time my eyes close

~

YOU

Sink in the deep blue

Sleep in a white hue

Swap your soul from a mild dew to a mindless clue.

.

You are the lightest cotton ever lived

The flame shining fieriest, so naive

Still, you can’t be lit

Your candle is melted and split.

.

Are these true?

Are they real?

Are they new?

Are these surreal?

.

It’s drilling in my head

The pain, the memories

It’s quaking under my bed

The past, the miseries

It’s boring in my skin

The thoughts, the regrets

It’s dripping down my chin

The tears, the threats

~

Those are just walls

When I’m stone-walling

Those are just imageries

When I’m imagining

Not even knowing

That nightmares are dreams too

~

Until I close my eyes

And my tears drip, then

Sink

Sleep

Swap

~

This time, my eyes close by themselves.

A Short Poem about a Dust

Posted: March 20, 2015 in POETRY
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dust

Your existence is

always questioned

at high cost.

~

Such that your tininess

always blinds

the curious eyes.

~

Your solitary life

is destined to happen

with a magical burst.

~

Perhaps you chose

to be alone,

but with others.

Be Grateful Everyday

Posted: March 18, 2015 in MY EXPERIENCE, SCHOOL, THOUGHTS
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Several hours ago, my heart is nowhere to found ; as it is throbbing so uncontrollably quick. The moment when I woke up at 7 am, I began to anticipate that the worst is yet to come. Soon, I picked up my cellphone to check the time lapsed since I rose from my cold bed. The floor seems to be pushing my feet to the space between the air and the ground. Chilling inside, I drank four glasses of water to lessen the nervousness pulling my body side to side. There where I stood steadily, I peeked at the window and watched how the sun shone on everything under it : how elegant its rays penetrate the neon-colored hearts; how its solarbeams reach the river-crossed and gold-struck eyes.

As I walked towards school, I’m still certain (and hopeful) that we could pass our programming defense. The fact that we stayed 9 pm last night was no joke at all. And as one of my classmates saw the other’s eyes teeming with rivulets of dirty white drops, I felt a strong empathy to one another. And as one of the members who didn’t help that much, I still hoped for the best that our main programmer would still be able to cope up the near-to-losing-hope scenario. Our eyes that night folded like leaflets lacking air, as for us we’re on the verge of throwing our hopes away. Like what others say- we can do it!

So the morning rush was sweet but bitter breeze kept coming passing through the corridors. Heading to the topmost floor, I witnessed them -Eyes have no sleep, minds wander inside the program, trying to squeeze every juice left between the brains and the codes. It’s so hard to see your teammates doing everything just to pass while you’re just standing on the distance, watching their suffering. I can’t take that to happen due to the fact that all of us are experiencing the same mental anguish.

The moment has come but thanks to my mates because instead of backing out without prior knowledge ( or just little knowledge) regarding the program, they strengthened their desire and confidence to an unimaginable level. Who would have done that while under extreme pressure? So much to say, the defense went smooth and quite jagged at the same time which we find still successful ( or at least a bigger % of surpassing). We barely aced it!

At the end of the day, my simple thank you won’t be still enough to repay the efforts of  our main programmer. From her sacrifices of late night staying up to teaching us how the code works, I still hope for the day that I could pay her efforts not in terms of money but in terms of good will and good deeds. I’m so grateful to meet people like her who never just think of herself but thinks of the greater good of our welfare. How beautiful God’s hands are! He cared so much that he made the finest people who will lead other’s lives; teach them how to color a rainbow and show them how to make the earth spin in a series of galactic elegance.

Still, I have so many things to thank for and I couldn’t count them all. From my life to friends and possessions, I think I’m still one of those luckiest and blessed kid ever lived. Trudging the streets with bright city lights as I look upon those children in the corner- some have no food to eat, no clothes to wear and no life to spare. Still, I’m thankful to God for his greatness he showed to me- How unfair life is, we still managed to survive somehow. This is the way of gratefulness as is – a blessing to seal in the jar of today’s adventure; so mysterious and prepossessing.

How good God is. Being endlessly thankful to Him is enough to pay half of his sacrifices he’d done for us. The other half goes on how we handle our lives and now up there, he’s already happy with that. JUST LOOKING AT OUR SMILES, HE’S ALREADY FULFILLED IN GIVING US PERPETUAL LOVE AND GRACE.

bbb_2

My messy handwriting

Who the hell cares in handwriting? As for others, it doesn’t mean something. Some say that handwriting does matter so much because it reflects your attitude.

Well, my handwriting appears to be really disorganized. To be honest, my handwriting varies depending on my mood. When I’m feeling good that day, expect my penmanship to be really smooth, very glossy and distinct. On the other hand, when I go home with a bad day, my handwriting would tend to be jagged, tiring and unaligned.

It’s truly a major impression when a handwriting is pleasant in everyone’s sight. Psychologists say that a person’s handwriting defines his/her attitude, which nearly hit my point. I just wish that it won’t also signify a person’s physique because sometimes, my handwriting is so unstable that it becomes really fat (lol I don’t want to be fat though haha).

So my handwriting is untidy. Does it suggest I’m also untidy when it comes to taking care of things? I must say yes. I have to admit it that my room is so dirty too. Lots of paper scattered in the closet, floor and dark places like corners.

My mind can be chaotic at times, especially those times when mixed emotions stir the tempo of my mood. I couldn’t sleep well. I couldn’t study well. I couldn’t even get a book from the mini shelf. I guess when a wicked hurricane tackles me so badly that day, my works are all being involved. From socializing to writing, my appetite would reach a serious decrementation. Honestly speaking mates. It will ruin my whole day.

Looking at the natural side of it, do writers care much in their penmanship? Based on my acquired knowledge, writers do not necessarily care in their handwriting. As much as they have written their pieces, they are already satisfied in that. And you know what? Writers have the messiest handwriting because due to the fact that they think fast, they write what they brainstorm so fast that they don’t mind anymore how decent their writings could end. But that doesn’t mean that all writers possess the same ability because I’ve also known some writers who have those sexy handwriting ( and with curves nuff said haha).

It’s up to you whether you disagree or not about the concept behind our handwriting. No matter who you are, I’m 100% sure that your handwriting sits beside a crown while smiling behind the clouds underneath the star-dusted galaxy. Every handwriting is genuine. It just takes someone to see it the right way; the suitable improvisation to place words nicely after our hands seize enough air to let our feelings fly freely, then later crash in the paper. Handwriting is more of self-discovery, as those lines we draw are what represent us in the future :the thing that we called life.

Jelly

Posted: March 15, 2015 in POETRY
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So this is a treat

So this is sweet

Is it transparent

Or a bit translucent?

You’re talking with him

My eyes are looking slim

Instead of focusing on you

I focus on the navy blue

And so yellow is a color

Why do my eyes sense an odor?

Does my nose see something

And what is this cunning feeling?

I must be soft

I must be affected

For every pinch, for every squeeze

I feel jelly.

I feel jealous.

You know that moment when you did your best but just ended up as failure? You know that moment when you expect things to be better but turned out worse?

You know those moments, right? What could possibly go wrong on them?

Most of us expect things to be great. Most of us rely on the brighter side of everything. Most of us eye for the light than darkness? But why there are incidents in our life that we just want to give up?  By mere fate? By strange chance? Or they are just bound to happen?

This is it. Friday. Just an ordinary day until my patience runs out. You know the game Dota 2? Well there’s what we called recycling of items which involves sacrificing ten items for  crucible charm jewel which contains lots of bundles (sets for heroes). If you predicted right ( that your team will win), you will gain one win. Win three battles and there you go, happy bundle! But if you predicted wrong and lose two battles, OMG, say bye to bundles and say hi to fragments. I have two charms, assuming that I will win them two. But damn, I felt so unlucky that day because I lose them both. I was really reckless in risking the charms until I figured out that i should first think of pros and cons before placing it on a danger zone. Bad luck and bad day= worst feeling. Sad life indeed.

The bad luck continued to roll on. Saturday. It’s our play today but sadly we didn’t win. I knew we did our bestest of the best but it turned out that the plaque wasn’t for us. I knew I might sound bitter here but this wasn’t the unlucky day for me. Holy wood of rainforest, the charm fragment curse resumed to amaze me. Amaze me to be annoyed again. You know that moment when you’re already at the end, so close yet so far still from the reach? You know that single push which is hard to do, simply because something seems to be dictating you inside your head? Well, bad luck mate. Bad luck. And the worst this day was when my aunt didn’t allow me to go to our overnight agreement. Sigh. I’d explained everything to her, but it seems that there’s a ringing force around me, hindering me from going. This was for project but for pete’s sake, I was just allowed to stay at house instead of doing our project. I didn’t have the force to reckon that I was right all along. Maybe they just cared for me. I understood that. They just cared for me.

How it feels to be unlucky the whole day?

-Your patience goes out of meter.

-Your blood boils like 100 degrees

-Skins go rough and cold( like reptiles)

-Notice the lines on the forehead. Yes, they stiffen.

-Eyes? Hmm. They are full of fury.

-Your hands want to punch someone but you can’t really do.

-You blame everything.

-You curse those who/what lead to your bad luck.

-You wish that this day is just a dream

-You wish to give up ( or try again next time then fail again)

For me, being unlucky is another term for chance dependents, considering that a bad luck is just a slight error to take note. Bad luck may affect the mood. It can ruin the whole good day. Even the whole week but not for months or years ( ’cause it may sound to be unrealistic). Unlucky persons tend to depend on good luck, thinking of things to be achieved shortly with little effort. Woah, does it sound like me? Haha. I guess so.

Today I realized something. The more we depend on luck, the more we get stressful when we don’t get the things we wanted. The more we think of luck, the more we forget the more realistic side of living. Let’s be thankful that we’re still here, living a normal and happy life even after a bad day. Let us also think of others who are not into living a normal life. They don’t deserve that miserable life, but we choose our life to be miserable. All of us undergo problems and sacrifices, it’s just the time that never ceases to unravel the angles of our different perspective when it comes to luck. Time is a tool that knows if luck is in our side or not. Fate could be reliable too, but fate could carry us into believing that all things come at the right time on the right track.

Who knows where time and fate might send you? Only God knows what’s best for us. No matter how unlucky or lucky our day is, he always seeks the best solutions in life. Indeed, everything happens for a reason. It just depends on us if we want to give up or carry on living.

Beginning this day, practice saying God bless instead of Good luck because you are blessed and not just lucky! 😉

Girls Who Love Reading

Posted: March 3, 2015 in HAIKU, POETRY
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Bubbly wandering

Of minds forged to love phrases

Milled from enchantment.