Life is a beautiful trap but this trap can be in the form of blessing in disguise. You felt thankful three hours ago when your parents didn’t permit you to leave. They wanted you to be safe. Unknowingly, you didn’t know what happened. If they let you leave, you could have ended dead in the bus that you were about to ride few moments ago.

I recall the times when I was 14 years old. I asked my teacher if she sees God.

“Have you already seen Him ma’am?”

“No. I just felt His presence.”

This made me curious. If people don’t see God, why do they pray? I get more doubtful of His existence. If God isn’t here,then where is He? If God is invisible, does he speak or at least feel?

It worried me: why can’t I see Him?

“Have you felt depressed or alone?”. A voice came from behind. I got shivers and I grew tensed. “Come here, I’ll help you.” The chills became more intense.

I didn’t see Him anywhere but his voice speaks his whereabouts. He was there, sitting on the corner, waiting for me. This was no concrete corner. When I mean corner of something pertains to the corner of our faith.

A strong faith is a foundation of strong belief. We need to unlearn many things, the same way that we learn new ones. But I don’t know where to hide or where to….

“Where will you run?”

I ran to Him. I’m not a fully devoted Christian. I don’t go to church every Sundays. I tell him, “Does it make me sinful?”. I’m slowly getting to the point of curling. “No, I loved you.” was his response. “If people don’t love you, I will love you relentlessly.”

He has this selfless love that is rarely seen on the streets. If you feel unloved, let Him know. He will love you with His mild grace.

If you are born poor, it won’t mean that you will also die as poor. You are already sufficient with His Grace. Just so you don’t know the importance of small things.

If you are weak, He will lift you up. Just so you don’t know the importance of a healthy spiritual living.

If you are sad, he will turn those frowns into rainbow smiles. Just so you don’t know the rain and sunlight: the problems and hopes.

He will hold your hand until your fears return to the deep wells of your negativities. We ask for forgiveness of our sins and He stays true in His word.

We don’t see him physically but his radiance is pure. His love to us can’t be measured in terms of money or time. He just needs your time. You just need to be patient.

Where is God?

Here, in my side.

 

 

 

dedbr.jpg

When we say home, that is our humble abode to peace and love. Whenever I ask someone their second home, they will answer school. I suppose they will say it because their teacher is their second parent and the school is a good place to sleep which is ridiculously true. What do you think of having a second home?

Strangely as it seems, my thoughts are glued to universe. Up above the clouds is the wonderwall of stars which spreads lustrous glitters right before our eyes. Extending beyond it lies a vast galactical space which is a home to planetary dusts, celestial bodies and planets. Unlike school, universe has no rooms. It is an open field which seems endless and void of human sound. You can only hear a crashing of heavenly body to another or a collision of planets. Even an explosion of a celestial entity can be seen there. In universe, the bizarre silence is what I love. My ears implode to the sound of zooming meteorites. That is a dreamy tickle. One night, I imagine myself inside this enormous basin. I tend to float in zero gravity while seeing specks of stars scattered everywhere. It is just marvelous. I get to see how planets rotate like a top. Million kilometers from where I swim motionless, I witness some exo planets. Some people say they are homes of aliens which by this day is still under astronomical studies. The universe’s subtlety is what makes it interesting. Its land area is fathomless; even millions of rulers cannot measure its depth. Even the greatest astronomers cannot reach its end. It is quietly mysterious like the black hole inside it. Scientists fear that one day the entire galaxy will be sucked up by this blackhole! It is a ruthless, empty hole that is believed to dwell somewhere; even light cannot escape from it. My assumptions are still crawling in its corners because there is this theory that continues to disturb my inner peace. If people is being controlled by the brain, could it possibly happen that the whole universe is just a brain of someone? It may sound absurd but who knows if it is true or not. Going back to basics, where all that we know about universe is the sun and the solar system. If I’m an inhabitant of the universe, I could see the sun closely just before I melt in front of it. It is an extremely hot ball. Imagine billions of erupting volcanoes!

From earth, we see it as a disco ball hanging from a string, giving life to us. If there is no sun, life will not be possible on earth. Earth will be a cold, dark abyss. On the other hand, if there is no moon, there will be no light at night. The moon is like a mirror which reflects light from the sun. Also, we could have missed the sky bathing in moonlight. What a sight to behold while a tear is dripping from an eye. Just beautiful.

Have you wondered how universe moves you to space and time? It rends the air of sadness and creates a special way of happiness. If there is anything valuable than it besides being a second home, it conspires with our thoughts as well in our dreams.

Singlehood – Is it a big deal?

Posted: April 10, 2017 in LOVE

single Being single – one of the loneliest feelings that one can ever experience.

You are with your friend; walking in the park, shopping at the mall and going to school together. Suddenly, you feel something thunderous. Yes it’s just a feeling towards a friend but admit it, there’s a bout of shuddering shakes quaking inside you. You can’t say a word. There’s a single time you run out of words to express. But who knows, that feeling is still mystic and unknown at the same time. Most people are afraid of being single forever. Truly they need someone to be with. Someone who can pour them a heavy dose of happiness. Someone who can fill their emptiness and replace their frowns with smiles reaching miles to miles. Someone who can pluck the stars from the heavenly tree. Something like those.

They say that the more loyal you are, the more you can get disappointments. The logic is, the more you expect a perfect relationship, the more you will end up with a downhill roll. Problem is, we always look for a quintessential soulmate. Her eyes match her lips, her nose suits the shape of her face. Her attitude fits the way she speaks. The other downside is, if we can’t find our desired qualities in a person, we tend to break from those bonds worth freeing. As if we sometimes cling on a tendency of another wrong encounter again. And there goes another slap of disappointment.

Do you want to be single forever?

I get used to hearing this question as if they encourage you to be in a relationship. People, especially teens, mostly below my age (okay include my age if you want to), are always active when the talking gets more intriguing about singlehood. They take it as a serious matter which should be given attention. I don’t think so, but the burgeoning mindsets of young people snowball in reality. I believe that the t.v. shows have an immense effect on their minds since a lot of shows portray heartbreak and love affair.

You could be single forever if you want to, and it could become a habit that you can carry the rest of your life. Singlehood is more of self-discovering: how and why you treasure yourself first before anything else. It buys you more time to know yourself better. It reveals your flaws and it suggests what you can improve for yourself. Before knocking someone else’s door and tackling someone with your soft heart, be sure that you are already prepared for the consequences that might follow.

Before throwing your hopes to another person, be sure that the next time you hook someone up, you are more mature and stronger than before.

Singlehood not only teaches us to be independent; it also lets us learn to thrive in different environments and adapt to the various attitudes of the people that we met. It may sound easy to be in a relationship because the stomping call of love is inevitable yet you can condone your emotions to stay as neutral as possible. Nobody knows for sure but one thing is just sure: people who have been single for a long time will find a better partner( cause they know themselves much better with depth and understanding) than those who rush for nothing, only to end in tears and tissue papers.

sad.jpg

Sadness begins in our experiences and starts creeping from our feet to our head. We wander like a lost child in the desert, as we grieve and long for a feeling that we seek, particularly when we get rejected or ignored. On the other hand, when we are happy, we just live through the thing that we love to do. Furthermore, these feelings affect how we write our poems, and how interpretations convey the picture of a specific piece.

Have you ever wondered why can you write fast and meaningful when you’re sad? That’s because you assume yourself as entirety of the poem. Imagine your experiences ; the pain, the heartbreaks and vile reminders of an obnoxious encounter. Sadness is a grave feeling that we used to hide but difficult to hold on. Moreover, it takes time to recover; to run away from the forest surrounded by the lonely vibes of the past. When you are unhappy, you lift yourself effortlessly in the air, only to permit overflowing ideas to crash through the humongous stones at the corners of our way of thinking. The state of despair also tells us that there is something that we should get rid out of our comfort zone, because we feel quite downcast behind the shadows that we cast. Visualize yourself walking the wintry mountain, cold and alone. You look for someone who can catch a fire for you but in reality you can’t even see them. Compared to poetry, the only person who can ignite spirits to commence elimination of unwanted emotions is you. You are the one who can set the fire to rain afterwards. In short, sorrow draws a response to us to make a way out, or shortcut to happiness.
Ever wonder why it is just hard to write when happy? Because when we are in summer-bound bliss, we enjoy the moment. When we are glad and floating in cloud nine, we are high like we never notice what is going on at the time except for eternal euphoria that seem to take the shape of our temporary emotions.So much for that, time ticks slower than usual when overjoy kills its tempo. Meanwhile, it glues yourself to that moment until you get tired and get over the fleeting ecstatic tickle. Then later you will just realize that it’s time to write poems again and you find it easier than before.

What Hides Behind Her Smile?

Posted: February 19, 2017 in THOUGHTS

I only caught her silhouette sitting just few inches from me. She was average in height, and there were cold bags that occupied the space beneath her eyes.

I was motionless and muted with all the voices around me. There was an empty, narrow aisle which was a home to slippers and shoes. To my left was a window, and fresh air was all that I got. I could smell different kinds of perfume but I didn’t know where they came from. Looking back to the vehicle’s rear, chasing cars and bikes were the common things to see. Nothing else to discover – nothing new.

The whole day was tiring, and math lessons kept my head spinning until my peripheral vision captured an unusual face. It was not a beautiful face that we always see in the t.v. but it was also not that revolting. To think she was not a dream girl that ( I think) can captivate our hearts instantly, she had this kind of eyes that have a curious sparkle to strangers.They hit me between my eyes and I’m kind of stoned to my position.

Turned out she’s as young as her heart. And I thought she could be more approachable when I looked to her round eyes.

For a moment of silence, the winds have changed and they turned cold. It seemed that post-December breeze had hit my face.

Just when the twilight crunched the blackness and whiteness, and the road was quite nigh to our house, she went down the vehicle with this “strikingly lovely” gaze that ensnared me for a couple of seconds.

She wasn’t perfect like the girls that I normally see every day but she had this thing that separates her from other girls that I’ve seen. If I say that a stare is cute or charming, it would be overrated.

Despite of that, I won’t bother mentioning that her right cheek dimple is too deep that it seems to light her whole day in the dark.

Thinking that something had made her more alluring, that was her smile that stopped my world for two seconds. Nothing else- somewhat new.

 

Short Reflection of Randomness

Posted: October 17, 2016 in THOUGHTS

There was this time when I want to glimpse over the clouds above. It was really a feeling I can’t contain. It was blue all over. I can’t help but to contemplate.

As I head to home a while ago, a quick rush of childish images have blurred the sights. It was invisible to all people except me. Flashy, emphatic – it has appeared for a short time. Two children straying on a street. They beg for food and people just pass by.

Another sight I saw was nature. She was crying. I looked lowly on the window to the river. Crying again. She was sad. She has this dress but not a chic and fashionable outfit. Decorations burst on her face. Black. All black. Dirt.Nothing but dirt.

Pollution. That’s the design.

Thirty minutes of space-warping imagining was full of unexpectedness. Will the driver ask me for an additional fare if he ever caught me swimming in a different world? The same world that I dwelt temporarily for thirty short minutes. No one will understand my weirdness except me. Oh wait. I’m wrong. You have read this so I bet you understand this right?

I wrote this for 15 minutes as time faded in my screen. Seven minutes have passed now. I was still typing. Non-stop until there’s no word left to spit. My brain would explode until it becomes a star. My imagination will become hues of summer.Tinted like autumn leaves that bounces rarely. Not even close I can get thrilled in my writing. It was randomness. Some sort of interstellar connection with the universe. Won’t you believe that whenever you contemplate, the whole universe listens until your pleads become stardust. Four minutes remaining in my time until I become a full-grown speck of galactical matter.

The next moment was for three minutes to leave the shop and to continue being child again for few hours, hoping that the next morning I will be a part of the so- called happy group of dust called sun.

 

Opaque

Posted: March 31, 2015 in HAIKU, POETRY
Tags: , , ,

Impassable heart

Refuses to seep lilac beams

Lifeless, blood in vain.

Ostriches

Posted: March 30, 2015 in MY EXPERIENCE, POETRY
Tags: , ,

os

(Originally written March 30,2014)

Back then were aliens and monsters
This time were mysteries I used to ponder
That always make me think
“How could they do that in a quick blink?”

I remembered one hazy March weather
When my bloodshot eyes unveiled a peculiar luster
All I’ve heard were trembling moans
That sound like sweet yet odd tones

Frozen in my bushy disguise
Like being stuck in an imaginary ice
I’ve witnessed the collision of incoming jet planes
The animals went wild in the wrong lanes

Unusual sightings continued to haunt me
As their temperatures rose unexpectedly
I couldn’t withstand the heat they’re giving
So I fell down in a ghostly building

Acids spat out on each other’s beak
Slender tongues simultaneously licked
As my tummy growled in disgust
Recovering from that gruesome blast

Tongue-twister speaking
While swiftly escaping
The dense, dark woods of ostriches
That gave me hundreds of stitches

My eyes close by themselves

Posted: March 29, 2015 in POETRY
Tags: , ,

In just a blink

you sink

.

In just a flip

you sleep

.

In just a finger snap

you swap

.

Just in time my eyes close

~

YOU

Sink in the deep blue

Sleep in a white hue

Swap your soul from a mild dew to a mindless clue.

.

You are the lightest cotton ever lived

The flame shining fieriest, so naive

Still, you can’t be lit

Your candle is melted and split.

.

Are these true?

Are they real?

Are they new?

Are these surreal?

.

It’s drilling in my head

The pain, the memories

It’s quaking under my bed

The past, the miseries

It’s boring in my skin

The thoughts, the regrets

It’s dripping down my chin

The tears, the threats

~

Those are just walls

When I’m stone-walling

Those are just imageries

When I’m imagining

Not even knowing

That nightmares are dreams too

~

Until I close my eyes

And my tears drip, then

Sink

Sleep

Swap

~

This time, my eyes close by themselves.

A Short Poem about a Dust

Posted: March 20, 2015 in POETRY
Tags: , , ,

dust

Your existence is

always questioned

at high cost.

~

Such that your tininess

always blinds

the curious eyes.

~

Your solitary life

is destined to happen

with a magical burst.

~

Perhaps you chose

to be alone,

but with others.